The Matrix
Unlike TheDragOnfruitS, I didn’t get pictures of my “cyst” for record keeping. The silver lining, however, is that I got a sweet Pathology Report:
GROSS DESCRIPTION:
The specimen is received fresh, identified with the patient’s name with initials [K], and labeled as “mass of left cheek.” It consists of an unoriented ellipse of tan, hairbearing skin measuring 1.5 x 0.5 cm and up to 1.1 cm in thickness. The specimen is serially sectioned and the cut surface reveals an intact cystic structure with a smooth membranous lining, which exudes a white, thick material. The specimen is entirely submitted in cassette A.
Gross description indeed! So the final diagnosis is that my lump was a Pilomatrixoma. The surgeon described it as a “benign tumor” to me. The size was not quite what I thought during my still-kinda-groggy state, but perhaps there was extra flesh around it (I was about half an inch off). Interesting that the dimensions were given in the metric system. If you hate yourself, you can click this link and see someone peeling aside a skin flap to expose a pilomatrixoma. Compared to some of the (horrible) pictures I’ve seen, mine was pretty tame. It basically just looked like my cheek had a slight, gradual bump in the middle.
The plastic surgeon took the square patch bandage off and took the sutures out. It was painless. My cheek is slightly depressed in the area where the pilomatrixoma was, and I can see the cut was kinda curved, similar to the way laugh lines run. I have a small piece of special tape holding the cut together now, and I have a checkup in about 3 weeks. I was happy to hear that the growth was benign, and my preliminary web research indicates they do not regrow. I was even happier to hear that I can eat a burger tonight.
By Kungfucius, 8/11/2008 @ 6:03 pm
Glad to hear that everything is recovering nicely. I too will have a burger in celebration of your successful surgery
By Chris, 8/11/2008 @ 6:31 pm
ZOMFG, you wake up and the world has turned metric!1 This experience must be worse than that of Buck Rogers or Planet of the Apes.
By Kabitzin, 8/11/2008 @ 7:55 pm
Yeah, you wouldn’t believe what the doctors called a quarter pounder.
By Chris, 8/11/2008 @ 8:10 pm
Of course I wouldn’t. They’re all hacks and quacks! Your doctors must be really rich that they can enjoy such expensive food as Big Macs and Whoppers. Ever since the Rebellion it’s all about Pizza Hut.
By Hung, 8/11/2008 @ 8:16 pm
You should have your pilomatrixoma with some fava beans and a nice chianti.
By Kabitzin, 8/11/2008 @ 8:35 pm
It was fresh. And creamy apparently.
By teahouseblossom, 8/11/2008 @ 10:25 pm
That’s kind of eerie, reading the pathology report..
I’m glad that it’s done and you’re recovering!
By Kabitzin, 8/12/2008 @ 12:41 pm
I had a gigantic double cheeseburger last night and it was absolutely amazing.
By Chris, 8/12/2008 @ 10:07 pm
I was half-expecting the description would end with “…but I eated it.” It seemed to be highly nomable at least. How are we ever gonna find out its taste now?
Oh, I notice you wrote “had”. I supposed you eated it or what else did you do with it? I would recommend ham for reconstructing your cheek over hashed meat.
By Jesus159159159, 8/15/2008 @ 10:23 pm
Its good to know that you’re ok!… can I kiss your boo-boo? *blush*
Heh, you Americans and your hamburgers! Why don’t you try my empanadas instead?! =3… I hope you don’t have that picture of the boxer’s (not the horse) exploding ear in your mind…
Oh, and the hate-yourself-link was awesome! XD